“Drunk David”

One afternoon an old gentleman dialed the wrong phone number and history was made. Apparently, he was looking for a man named David.

“Francis Calls a Prostitute”

Everyone's favorite senior citizen, Francis Conklin, calls a prostitute as a Veteran’s Day treat.

“Shark in the Tub”

While fishing off the "tip point" of Goddard park in Warwick, Rhode Island, our fisherman here nabs a "real life" shark. Who else to call in a situation like this, but your local aquarium experts at Petco.

“Trouser Father”

I call the manager of a local thrift store with incredible news. After an unbelievable turn of events, my wife is impregnated by a pair of pre owned pants! How did this happen? Is it even possible? No, absolutely not. But it is if you can convince them! Recorded in 2005.

“The Bones and the Teeth”

A telemarketer offering chimney sweeping services calls an elderly woman named Mrs. Iannotti. She is the proprietor of a crematory, has lost a few marbles, very religious, and extremely ornery. She is also concerned about the bones and the teeth, and the bones.

“All Worked Up”

A particularly stubborn telemarketer offering chimney sweeping services calls me back after previously hanging up on me.

“I’m a Silly Seagull”

I place an ad on craigslist hiring a waitress or hostess for "Silly Seagulls"- Egg Roll & Clam Shack: Authentic Asian/New England Cuisine